I really don’t know why I chose him as my life partner. Yea, at the first place I know him as a very protective brother, I like him that way, then there comes problem between me and my ex boyfriend, and as usually I need a shoulder to cry on there he is, I’m the on who pick his shoulder actually, then from there, everything started to be more complicated then before.
For the first time, he will call me every 2 minutes and yea, my heart can melted easily so you know what happened. Just a few weeks after my brake up with my ex, I accept him as my new boy. Thing was so beautiful at first until one day a bitch call me and claims that he is her husband and they live together. I was in shock and I’m sure that he is not that kind of guy who would take advantage from a heart broken girl like me. So I and that stupid bitch had a fight and I know, I didn’t really know who this guy really is but I have my confidence toward him (just confidence but not trust).
Day after day, week after week, month after month, the problem between me and that crazy bitch never solve but it’s getting worst because he is a type of guy who can easily attract girl with only using his tongue. Until one day, that bitch called me and there is another bitch in collaboration with his ex wife (forgot to mention earlier he is a single father) attack me via phone call and message and not to forget my family back at my home town. They really pissed me off…!
Yea, I admit during that period of time I also contact with some other guys but think about it as a revenged toward the pain that he give me. My ex boyfriend do contact me but I have no feeling toward him anymore but as for him, I’m not sure whether his feeling toward all of this bitches are gone or not yet.
Until now, it’s been more then a year I’m with him and I do love him and want him to be my husband but all of the past still can get out of my head. He still failed to earn my trust and I don’t know, we fighting every single day and I don’t really know why it is about. I don’t know whether I will have a bright future with him or it will end up in the middle of it.
He didn’t understands why did I rebel every single day, he say he did but he is not at my place facing the same feeling every single day in the prison that he called home. I’m 20 and I’m not meant to be doing all of the house wife stuff (I hate it so much actually). It’s ok to kept me here the whole week If during the weekend you going to be by my side even for just window shopping, but what did I get from week to week? Nothing! (his working 7 days a week, 12 hours per day).
I am so sick and tired facing all of this stuff every single day. I always dreaming of spending time with him like how my girlfriend did with their boyfriend, but no..! I never had it... He can say that I’m childish or what so ever, but this is the only thing that I want from you! It’s to hard right? I’m not sure how long can I stay in this situation, but seriously, I can’t take it anymore now.
I cry every single day after you gone to your work place, but you didn’t know it. Only today I have a chance to cry right in front of you and yea you did get back from work earlier but did you come to me to comfort me after a long day fighting? Did you read my message that I send to you saying that I’m starving and invite me for a dinner? No..! What did you do now is just sit back and watch NARUTO…..!!
Is this the meaning of “I do understand you”? you have experienced in married and divorce before, I’m sure you can think wisely about women heart and feeling, but I don’t know, maybe you just don’t want to do it or you are lazy enough to do it. Maybe I deserve this because I broke too many hearts before. So that’s it, let’s leave it to god to decide whether we are meant to be together forever or just for a mean time.
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